My Dear Sisters and Brothers in Christ 

In his book, "Reaching Out," Henri Nouwen tells of an ordinand who is killed just as he completes his studies and is about to begin his ministry. He says:-

'Those who knew him well felt a strong, angry protest arising from their hearts. Why him, a very noble man who could have done so much for so many? Why now? ... Why in this way? ... A strong, angry response seemed the only human response.'

I heard similar sentiments expressed about Peter Monageng's death. When someone as gifted and as much loved as Peter dies at so young an age it is, perhaps, inevitable that people will cry out in protest to God at the loss of such a person. But, says Nouwen, our protest has less to do with the person who has died than it has to do with our own fears in the face of death. Nouwen says:-

'...such a protest is the continuation of our illusion that we know what life is all about, that we rule it and determine its values as well as its goals. We do not and are challenged instead to convert our protest against the absurdities of the human existence into a prayer lifting us beyond the boundaries of our existence to him who holds our life in his hands and heart with boundless love and mercy.'

It is a liminal moment, a moment of powerlessness in which our finiteness is caught up in the mystery of God. In the pain is an invitation to growth. It reminds us that our lives are caught up in the wonderful purposes of God and that our story is not limited by our finiteness, but has its place in the unfolding purposes of God's story. Life is not simply about us and what we want, but about life in Christ - our lives in God's life. The spiritual journey is not about finding God, but about realising that we have always been held in God's divine love and purpose. "For in him we live and move and have our very being" (Acts 17:27). God is the larger context, the one who makes story possible and in whom our stories find their meaning.

This, says Eugene Peterson, is why immersing ourselves in the scriptures is so important. It counters the common and current practice of taking personal experience as the basis for living, and instead, draws us into the unfolding of a story that speaks of God's divine love and purpose and that invites our participation in God on God's terms. It thus becomes the text in which we find our story and by which we live our lives. It is not a textbook of moral theology, a handbook of instruction on how to live one's life. It is not about information at all, but about formation; our life changed by the Living Word who comes to us in the written word. The text draws us into relationship with the one in whom we live our lives.

This comes through very strongly in the story of the call of Jeremiah (Jer. 1: 1-10) which was recently one of our Morning Office readings. "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations." Our story is rooted in God's unfolding purposes, and the question for us, as for every life, is not how long we will live, nor how successful we will be, but how faithfully we have walked with God.

May you end as you began, in God. And may each moment in between be lived in Christ

+ Brian

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